Prep Unit

If you love yuppies (or are one) as much as I do, you will want to see this!

Check out "Tea Party"

Woman's Poem/Man's Poem

WOMAN'S POEM

Before I lay me down to sleep,
I pray for a man, who's not a creep,
One who's handsome, smart and strong.
One who loves to listen long.
One who thinks before he speaks.
One who'll call, not wait for weeks.
I pray he's gainfully employed,
When I spend his cash, won't be annoyed.
Pulls out my chair and opens my door,
Massages my back and begs to do more.
Oh! Send me a man, who'll make love to my mind.
He knows what to answer to "how big is my behind?"
I pray that this man will love me to no end.
And he'll always be my very best friend.

MAN'S POEM

I pray for a deaf-mute nymphomaniac with huge boobs who owns a liquor store and a golf course.
I know this doesn't rhyme and I don't give a shit.

Thank You

Unfortunately in life we can not foresee the future, and you never quite can tell when you will need to rely on the help of a stranger.

Driving home today from work today in a car that I borrowed from a friend (mine died earlier in the week) my front tire blew out and disintegrated onto 395. The car began to shake as I clutched the wheel, checked my rear view mirror, and coasted off the highway (fortunately I was at my exit). I came to a complete stop at the intersection where two off ramps merge.

I jumped out of the car, inspected the damage and began pulling and twisting my hair as shock set in. Cars zoomed off the highway at me (there was no shoulder) honking their horns and making rude gestures. I jumped onto the grass divider, realizing that it was simply a matter of time before someone slammed into me.

A car pulled over. much to my relief and asked if I needed help. Todd, a retired Marine Corps officer blocked the lane with his SUV. I pulled the car onto the grass while he pulled out a jack and without question started changing my tire. . . All the while people honked and cursed.

I am indebted to Todd for his gracious assistance and I just wanted to take this opportunity to thank all of the Service men and women who have not only served their country on assignment and deployment, but serve their countrymen every day by being responsible, giving citizens. In this day and age self sacrifice, humility and courage are rare qualities but the Service men and women who embody them give me hope that these qualities still prevail.

So thank you!

NYC Heat

Just a few minutes ago, I leaned over to unplug something so that I could charge my ipod. While leaning, my hair got stuck in my fan. There was some pulling and grinding until the fan finally stopped- inhibited by my hair.

I walk around the apartment with the fan held up next to my head, trying to figure out if my roommates will kill me if I wake them. I decided they would. I went to the bathroom and was forced to CUT the hair from my fan. A large chunk of hair, lost to the NYC heat!! Why does this shit always happen to me???

~ BAP

The Art of Seduction - Robert Greene

The back cover reads; Get what you want by manipulating everyone's greatest weakness: the desire for pleasure. ~ This is crap, but the book is entertaining and fascinating, I have learned much about myself and others. . . it is worth a read.

There are nine seductive personalities, you will identify with one of them, I am the "Dandy" ~ Most of us feel trapped within the limited roles that the world expects us to play. We are instantly attracted to those who are more fluid than we are - those who create their own persona. Dandies excite us because they cannot be categorized, and hint at a freedom we want for ourselves. They play with masculinity and feminitity; they fashion their own physical image, which is always startling.

More interesting then defining yourself, is defining the people in your life, outlining their seductive qualities and understanding their effect on you. For example I have profiled a friend as a "cold coquette" ~ the ability to delay satisfaction is the ultimate art of seduction - while waiting, the victim is held in thrall. Coquettes are the grand masters of the game, orchestrating a back-and-forth movement between hope and frustration. They bait with the promise of reward which however, proves elusive.

While I had earlier identified that my relationship with this person was not of the ordinary nature, I could never explain why I kept returning to them when I found most encounters unsatisfying (no I am not talking about a certain male libertarian . . . if that was what you were thinking).

The world is full of people who try, people impose themselves aggressively. . . Cold coquettes create space by remaining elusive and making others pursue them. Their coolness suggests a comfortable confidence that is exciting to be around, even though it may not actually exist. I found this particular relationship frustrating as all hell. I would be drawn in with the promise of reward, but there was never a commitment, but never a firm denial either. When you are caught in a situation where the person has neither said "yes" or "no" you are left in an enticing situation of paradox.

For this reason coquettes are "maddening" to deal with because the reward of the relationship is always out of reach. Before reading this book my strategy for dealing with this type of person was to wait for them to initiate interaction, then fulfill my side of the commitment; over and over again I was disappointed but reluctantly would forgive and forget and the cycle would begin again. Now I see that there is really only one way to deal with this type of person, they want to be pursued ~ Seduction is a process of drawing people in, making them want to pursue you, but I'll keep that to myself .

Victim Theory:

Nobody in the world feels whole and complete. We all sense some gap in our character, something we need or want but cannot get on our own. We fall in love, it is often with someone who seems to fill that gap. The process is usually unconscious and depends on luck. . . never try to seduce someone who is your own type. You will be like two puzzles missing the same pieces.

Greene argues that it is the role of the seducer is to play on the desires of people ~desire is generally preceded by feelings of emptiness, of something inside that needs fulfillment. This is the ultimate tool of the seducer. While antagonizing a person and controlling them by promising satisfaction but never delivering is cruel this analysis can be useful and interesting if you apply it to yourself.

We are all looking for love, and generally speaking as Greene stated, we fall in love with that person who makes us feel whole, with someone who seems to fill that gap. If we can identify what that gap is in ourselves we can narrow down our search for people who embody what we desire. In reflection on the past year the thing that I lack in my life, the thing that REALLY turns me on, is intellectual discussion/debate.

Now that I have identified my "gap" I can pursue it more intelligently by participating in activities that attract people like myself . . . people looking for a good analytical, intellectual discussion. This way, I can satisfy my intellectual desires, make new friends, expand my network, and keep an eye out for potential hopefuls. What every person wants out of life is to find someone who completes them, this search is much easier if you know what you are looking for. Now that I have this knowledge, I can focus on people who satisfy my needs and who have the potential to be satisfied by me.

Greene argues that people who do not understand the "art of seduction" and thusly, don't utilize their seductive qualities are "lazy" and have "repressed their desire for power." He even argues that it is moral to seduce a person, that they enjoy being on edge and in agony. Obviously this is crazy, and anyone who employs seductive measures are simply displaying their own insecurities and weaknesses. Though it is safe to argue that we can learn from the lessons of seducers; by understanding our natural seductive qualities, our most internal desires, and the qualities of others we can us this knowledge to find that person that satisfies us and likewise whom we satisfy as well.

Mutual satisfaction and trust are the defining characteristics that distinguishes love from obsession; when in love we surrender willingly, when seduced we surrender by coercion.

Near Death or Getting There

Funny how you aren't aware of the grave danger that have placed yourself in until it is too late.

I was invited to a house party in NE on Saturday night, I was excited about attending what promised to be a swank affair thrown by the DC Young Republican Committee Man. The address was NE DC so metroing would be fine, right?

Wrong!

The closest metro stop was Howard University. We emerged from the metro station and found that we were on unmarked territory. Deciding that the best bet would be to walk down one of the residential streets where nice cars were parked, two naive white girls hit the pavement in their heels and party dresses. We hadn't made it more than two blocks when we both suddenly stopped as the hair on the backs of our necks stood on end.

"Was that gun shots?"

"No, they came from a car"

"I think that it was fire crackers, I saw flashes."

"What, flashes . . . there are small explosions when guns are fired, little white flashes from the barrel!"

(When witnessing a drive by, only white people debate the probability of having heard guns shots)

The car drove towards us as we held our breath. Much to our relief it screeched around the corner before reaching our block. We decided to turn around.

We made our way to Florida Avenue, at least it was a major street, both of us hoping that the neighborhood would improve. When it didn't we turned off course towards a new development, this was a better walk.

Finally we make it to North Capital Street, this is not the section of NE that I was expecting. As we wait for the light to change a car pulls to the curb, a young gentleman rolls down the window and flicks his light cigarette at me. I dodge it, not wanting to get a burn mark on my eco-friendly hemp guacho pants.

Once inside the safety of the townhouse, we realize that we were less out of place inside than out. The house is packed . . . full of 30-40-50 somethings desperately trying to not look desperate. There is a replica case filled with statues of elephants in the living room, reminiscent of the one I saw in the Capital Hill Club. This only adds to the desperation of the scene. We decide to have one drink before we leave, and though our youthful presence is awkward, I want to explore.

We are approached by a man, he asks if the food on the table had "fallen on the floor, because he just ate some?" Somehow, as bizarre as this may seem, we both get the feeling that this was some sort of pick-up line gone horribly astray and decided to retreat upstairs.

Upstairs is even more bizarre. There are four rooms, a make shift TV room, complete with 70's couch and an old 13 in TV, which from my estimations was probably made in the 70's as well. The next room is a closet sized bedroom, then comes the make shift office, then the master bedroom. The master bedroom was the most interesting room. In the middle was a bed with no comforter, surrounding the bed were heaps of socks, cheap suits and bad ties. Books were piled everywhere while business cards, ID cards, and boxes of matches lay strewn like confetti on the floor. Hanging in the window were plants in ornate oriental planters. I thought this is what happens when you are alone and desperate for too long, you die and go to bachelor hell. Please God, don't let this happen to me!

We depart hastefully fearing that the longer we were there the more the desperation would have a chance to wear off on us. In the cab we cling to our youth, exhale and breath a sigh of relief. I wasn't sure which scene was scarier, the ghetto or a the reality of a departed youth. As we stop at a red light we wittiness two gangsters hugging and canoodling in the street, I was unaware that they did this. Gay gangsters . . .not something that you see everyday! Slightly overwhelmed by the events of the evening, I start to laugh as I slouch down in my seat when I see them glance my way.

The rest of the evening was not nearly as eventfully, though almost; I met up with friends at the Cap lounge and this is what happened, the night included a bar tender who was clearly on crack (yes I checked for track marks and she had em), pool, boys from Kentucky, and one aggressive 250 pound rugby player who threatened gang rape. Yes, I got into a stand off with him, damn it! I had had enough for one evening and when backed into a corner my inner New Yorker comes out!

So . . . how was your night?

DCYR

I emerge from the metro surrounded by tall buildings and street signs with no general sense of direction. Confused, I start down the block, turn and proceed in the opposite direction, there is a boy sitting on a bench. I pause and ask him "where is the Capital Hill Club" he looks across the street and points to a four story building and says; "the one with the green awning." I thank him and dart across the street only to notice that the awning very clearly, in bold has written on it Capital Hill Club.

As I open the doors and enter I am flanked by two 4 foot sculptures of elephants, I must be in the right place! To the left French doors are open to a view of well dressed young professionals mingling about. The room is cold and large, on the walls hang life size portraits of what appear to be very important individuals in there Sunday best. Against the far wall is a cabinet filled with again . . . elephants. I ask "is this the DC Young Republican meeting." It is, I talk to a cute boy from Nebraska, he is funny and a bit shy.

During the course of the evening I meet several people; Rachel, Chris, Molly, and Patrick. Molly is from Maine, it turns out she went to school with Emily Scott from IBM. Rachel works in DC mostly on campaigns, she is excited about campaign season coming up again and explains a little bit to me about the type of events that I can get involved with. She is a strikingly pretty girl, long curly brown hair, her dress is less preppie than the others, infact almost hippie except for the huge silver and gemstone David Yurman ring that she wears on her middle finger.

Next I make my way to Chris, he is a Young Republican board member, he spoke infront of the group for several minutes with much eloquence and composure. I find out later that he is a lawyer in DC. He asks if I would like to sign up for grass roots activities, and I agree. He is charming, slightly shy one-on-one. Definitely my kind of republican, tall, dark and handsome, clean cut and sophisticated yet simply dressed, not put on or pretentious. We talk a bit, we actually have a lot in common, he writes a blog, mostly about politics. It is a republican blog though he has libertarian thought intermingled (for those of you who don't know what a libertarian is it is a person fighting for "liberty" or a "classical liberal" - a person who advocates maximizing individual rights and minimizing the role of the state.) We talk about DC voting rights, an issue that is on his mind since a bill that he tried to get passed was just turned down.

I depart, having made enough initial contact. I am pleased with my experience, I accomplished my goal of meeting driven young people in a neutral setting who share many of my same interests and beliefs. I also leave with a handful of flyers for other social events, and several more ideas for volunteering on the hill. I wonder why I hadn't thought of this before. What a perfect way to meet people who aren't connected to work.

I found this group online via Meetup, other Meetup groups you might be interested in are;

The Woodbridge Attention Deficit Disorder Meetup Group
The Bowie Dungeons & Dragons Meetup Group
The Pikesville Hippies Meetup Group
Toy Dog Meetup: The Fulton Toy Dog July Meetup
Boardgames Meetup: Game Show Event
Polyamory Meetup: The Northern Virginia Polyamory July Meetup
John Kerry Meetup: Democratic Victory 2006 July Meetup
Fight Big Media Meetup: The Washington Fight Big Media July M...
Divorce Support Meetup: The Bristow Divorce Support July Meetup
Alt-Country Meetup: The Alt-Country Meetup Group for DC, MD, ...
Stay At Home Moms Meetup: Steve Songs (Potomac Library)
Child free Meetup: Mango Mike's
J.R.R. Tolkien Meetup: The Washington J.R.R. Tolkien July Meetup
Quantum-Touch Healing Meetup: Quantum-Touch Basic Workshop Ju...
French Bulldog Meetup: The Northern Virginia French Bulldog J...
Toyota Prius Meetup: The Washington Toyota Prius July Meetup
Pagan Meetup: The Fairfax Pagans Meetup

Bikini Bottom Pancakes

If you are like me you love to eat EVERYTHING, from Cheetos to oso buco. You are in love with the sensual appeal of food; its color, texture, aroma. Food doesn't just feed your body, but your soul. This sort of passion for food is wonderful if you have the metabolism of Kate Moss, but let's face it, some of our favorite foods in addition to pleasure add pounds.

Thanks to Dr. Atkins and other pioneers of his sort, the American public has become overwhelmed by the popularity of low carb diets. I myself follow a modified South Beach Diet. I find this sort of diet comes in especially useful for what I like to call "curve control" during the summer months when the reality of having to squeeze into an itsy-bitsy bikini bottom is staring me in the face. I am ecstatic with the results of the diet but I have to admit that it leaves A LOT to be desired when it comes to the sensual appeal of food. Most of my favorite foods are banned from the diet; apple pie, pancakes, penne a la vodka. This leaves me constantly searching for new recipes that cut down on bad carbs without cutting down on appeal.

My most recent discovery is a recipe that I call "Bikini Bottom Pancakes." They are pancakes made from an Oat Bran, which has 1/4 the amount of carbs as regular white flour and is high in fiber and protein. I began by purchasing Arrowhead Mills Pancakes & Waffle Mix from Whole foods (if you want to start from scratch combine whole grain wheat flour, oat bran, soy milk powder and baking powder). I followed the recipe on the back which called for;

1 cup of Arrowhead Mills Oat Bran Pancake and Waffle Mix
1 egg beaten
1 tbsp Canola Oil
1 tbsp honey
2/3 cup of milk

Realizing that these pancakes would leave much to be desired in the way of taste and aroma, I searched for ingredients to enliven them a bit. I added the following ingredients;

1 tsp vanilla
1/4 cup copped walnuts
1/4 cup copped sugar free chocolate
1 sliced banana

Make sure when preparing pancakes that the skillet is hot and buttered. To test drop a tsp of batter into the pan, it is ready if you hear the batter sizzle on the heat. Also, don't over mix the batter, that causes it to become thick and tough, mix gently then allow to rest for one minute to dissolve any remaining lumps. Oh, and never flip twice, that causes the pancakes to dry out. I found that the result was a fabulous, sensual meal that was both satisfying and guilt free.

Actually, I think that I liked these pancakes better than the regular version, the combination of the savory flavors of the bran and walnuts combined with the sweetness of the chocolate and bananas created a far richer experience on my pallet.

Enjoy!

For more on food and food blogging go to www.eatfoo.com where I found the inspiration for this post.

A Catch 22 of Sorts

So what is my problem with men?

Actually I don't have a problem with men, the problem was me. For a long time I have been lonely, no more lonely than the typical 20-something, but lonely none-the-less. Last September, my loneliness was compounded by a broken heart and had evolved into despair. This despair was both over my loss, but also due to the fact that in my first venture in love I inadvertently lost myself.

As life goes it took me a while to find myself again, but in the mean time I had fallen into a psychology where I believed that I could cure my loneliness and despair by finding someone, that "special someone"! Obviously no one person can cure you, funny how that intuition is so obvious and yet I was certain that love would "conquer all." No wonder I was such a boy repellent, I was harboring enough anxiety to cause category 3 earthquake on the Richter scale.

Having for a long time been able to exhale with clear lungs my outlook on dating has changed. My mood is much lighter, carefree, even I dare say, flirty. I suddenly find myself wanting to go on awkward first dates; smiling coyishly, twisting my hair around my finger, getting buzzed of three glasses of wine, asking:

"Where are you from?"

"What do you do?"

"Did you study abroad?"

"Oh you are so funny te he!"

OK, that last one was a joke. Actually, it is the excitement of a stranger that I am turned on by. That must be a sign of stability. But alas, where are these strangers? I find the dating scene in DC tedious. Mostly because of my own defects. I can't seem to untangle the bar scene, it just isn't my speed. That leaves extra curricular activities and friends of friends as my dating options. Well, um, this very anti-social activity of blogging is my new hobby, along with reading and jogging. So . . . that leaves friends of friends, oh wait, most of my friend's friends are my friends already!

Damn!

Of course being the go getter that I am, I have committed to picking up some new more social hobbies. Besides I miss rock climbing, and I love politics and intellectuals, so why not get involved in that scene. We are in DC.

But in the mean time, if you know any TALL, relatively good looking, intellectual, athletic, practical boys who likes moderately crazy blonds, and has a sense of humor coupled with a sense of adventure, send him my way.

Keep on keep'n on.

Who Needs a Skull Anyway?

Dude, you know you've had a bad day when third degree burns lead to your skull falling off and you live to tell about it!

Sheesh!

Face Value

I am sitting in CAPT Piburn's office, the smell of chai and fluorescent lights hangs on the air. We are discussing why Whidbey received erroneous dues (DWKs) which DLA attributes to attempts to correct DAAS. Bored with this topic, and to conquer the thoughts swirling my head, I decide to explain the grief of losing a friend. I am writing in cursive handwriting . . . my cursive needs work.

I haven't had many friends like Jeff, in fact I think that Jeff has taught me a lot about what it means to be a friend and what I can expect from a real friend. Besides our constant bickering and obvious irritations, I have come to love Jeff. Our bond evolves around our shared sarcastic and caustic sense of humor, though it goes deeper than that, our bond is something more intuitive. I lack a better explanation.

I think that Jeff is one of the few people who has taken the time to understand me. He is the type of person who doesn't just take who you are at face value, but somehow knows how to prod at what lies beneath, at what you are hiding. I have never had a friend listen to me so earnestly, offering both support and constructive guidance without making me feel crazy or disfunctional. His ability to see and relate to both sides of any story is an uncanny human ability. Sometimes, despite his Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles sweatshirt and devilish smile, he seems to have a wisdom that transcends both gender and age.

Jeff and Greg have given me something that I have been missing . . . community; a little disfunctional family and a place to belong. This, I don't know why, has changed me.

A Love Affair

I am writing just to tell you that I will miss you and that I love you. Not like I love you, love you, but there are some people that you just connect with and understand. Some friends are more than just good friends, they are almost like family, almost. You have been such a great buddy, so much fun, so funny, and really just a genuine person that it breaks my heart to see you go. I wish that there was something better than words to express what your friendship has meant to me, but alas there is not. I can only say that knowing you has made me in some ways a better person (minus the cereal incident) and I will always appreciate that. Thanks for being such a great confidant, always listening with a patient ear, and always steering me in the right direction. Thanks for being my friend!

I love you and miss you already!

Love Carolyn June 28th 2006

Leveraging Communication

"You're going to meet with criticism no matter where you go. The question is whether you can maintain your own sense of direction while still listening to what people have to say." ~ Jeremy, San Francisco Art Institute

About Chad . . .

If you have been following this blog (and if you are reading this right now then you are one of the few who follow this blog) you are familiar with a certain theme . . . Chad. I know for a fact that he (like many of my other friends) does not like to be the subject of my posts, so out of respect for him this will be my last post containing his name.

Since the last 10 months have been somewhat of a saga [having nothing to do with my exaggerated, emotionally charged style of writing ; )] I would simply like to report that Chad and I are on good terms. Nothing more, nothing less, no expectations or regrets (well for me that is). I must admit that my blog has been ever so boring now-a-days, but for every peak, there is a valley.

On Another Topic . . .

It has been pointed out to me that I use my blog as a venue to leverage communication. "Tu chez!" I can't really argue with that. However, though my posts may appear to be personal letters at times, be sure that they are always addressed to me. I blog to release the thoughts in my mind, to let them free, to have a life of their own . . . I find it very therapeutic actually.

Blogging is a way to sort through my emotions, to make sense of them, to understand myself and my perception of the world. There is also, I have found, an additional benefit to my blogging . . . on occasion I have been approached by my friends about topics I have written about. I very much value these exchanges, I learn so much about other perspectives and points of view. Though blogging is voyeuristic in nature, my intention in making my personal thoughts public was to open myself up in hopes that there would be topics that would connect with people in some way.

Anyway, I am enjoying the ride . . . come along with me.

An Ideology to Remember

People live for fulfillment. They find security in believing in something greater than themselves. The things that people often live for are not attainable, they are legends, dreams, fantasies,missions, promises, themes. Our dreams and fantasies keep us going, if we do not have dreams we would grow tired and cynical. . .

Politicians unite people around certain themes, religions unite people around promises and ideologies, and the military unites people around a mission.

Generally, ideologies develop around a certain culture and exist as a goal, attainable only in theory in which most members of the society strive for. People align themselves with this ideology, often adopting it as part of their identity. I am a "Christian, a Republican, an Intellectual, I am a Soldier." The members of these groups believe their ideologies righteous and often are gladly willing to make personal sacrifices to promote the ideology that they support. The ideology can also become co-mingled with the person's ego; "I am an intellectual" , "I am an activist", "I am going to heaven." Ideologies that have lasted become culture blurring the fine line between custom and theory.

I have begun to notice that at IBM we have no such ideology, no mission, no unifying theme. This is ironic because at IBM we have a strong sense of culture and an identity. We are all IBMers. I set myself out to discover the IBM ideology, and found that the task was more difficult than I anticipated.

At IBM what unites us. . . ?

As we move forward as consultants and our business grows what are we marching towards?

It is impossible to unite a diverse group of people on any static topic (example: utilization); what will appeal to one group will alienate another. To unite a diverse group you must appeal to their mortality; the experiences that they share as humans. We are all mortals, we all know pain, fear and happiness. Our mission, if it is one that we will all walk towards together at IBM, must appeal to each person on a human level.

Hocus Pocus

Republican or Democrat, eminent domain makes everyone's blood boil!

Is is just me, or at time does it seem that the Government is convenient venue for the rich to control the poor?. . . in the name of social-well-being that is.

I Love the 80's!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yehs68gQByI

Coming Home

You are all probably hearing about the riots in Kabul following an unfortunate motor vehicle accident. I am fine, All of us, (U.S., Canadian, Germans) are securely ensconced here at Camp
Blackhorse. The camp is set back from major roads and far enough away from Kabul city to avoid any clashes with rioters. Actually spent the mornin g here working then at a tank shoot run by the German Panzer ETT. Pics attached. All the best, Bill

p.s. The picture of the kids is from a recent convoy. Kochi (Co-Chee)? people are nomads who
have wandered and continue to migrate across the central asian plains and mountains with their sheep/goats and camels for the last 4-5,000 years. Camp is in the background

p.p.s. Our reliefs are here!!!! My relief is LCDR Bob Schug formerly of Supply Support Battalion 2! Good guy from Syracuse, NY. Turnover has commenced! Hats off to Rotation LIMA, they are here for twelve months, boots on ground.

~ LCDR, SC, USN

The Art of Seduction

"Most of us understand that certain actions on our part will have a pleasing and seductive effect on the person we would like to seduce. The problem is that we are generally to self-absorbed: we think more about what we want from others than what they could want from us. We may occasionally do something that is seductive, but often we follow this us with a selfish or aggressive action."

I am reading "The Art of Seduction" by Robert Greene. Not so much so that I can seduce people (that's just not my style) but to be educated in the tricks and manipulations of those people who entertain themselves playing with the psychology of unsuspecting victims.

I find the tone of the author to be annoying, he frequently confuses love with obsession and seduction with relationship. He argues for the amoral behaviors of seducers and tries to justify a play for power as he teaches his readers to break down their victims until they surrender. I would be find this exacerbating if it weren't for the feeling that Greene is bating his readers; almost daring them to read further. He making a play on the very human weaknesses that he sites in his book; the human attraction to the forbidden, danger, and the slightly evil.

The First part of the book is interesting in psycho-analysis. Greene identifies 9 seductive personality traits, one (or more) of which we all posses.

Which one are you? Which one am I?

1. The Siren: A man is often secretly oppressed by the role he has to play — by always having to be responsible, in control and rational. The Siren is the ultimate male fantasy figure because she offers a total release from the limitations of his life. In her presence, which is always heightened and sexually charged, the male feels transported to a world of pure pleasure. She is dangerous, and in pursuing her energetically the man can lose control over himself, something he yearns to do. The Siren is a mirage; she lures men by cultivating a particular appearance and manner. In a world where women are often too timid to project such an image, learn to take control of the male libido by embodying his fantasy.

2. The Rake: A woman never quite feels desired and appreciated enough. She wants attention, but a man is too often distracted and unresponsive. The Rake is a great female fantasy-figure — when he desires a woman, brief though that moment may be, he will go to the ends of the earth for her. He may be disloyal, dishonest and amoral, but that only adds to his appeal. Unlike the normal, cautious male, the Rake is delightfully unrestrained, a slave to his love of women. There is the added lure of his reputation: so many women have succumbed to him, there has to be a reason. Words are a woman's weakness, and the Rake is a master of seductive language. Stir a woman's repressed longings by adapting the Rake's mix of danger and pleasure.

3. The Ideal Lover: Most people have dreams in their youth that get shattered or worn down with age. They find themselves disappointed by people, events, reality, which cannot match their youthful ideals. Ideal Lovers thrive on people's broken dreams, which become lifelong fantasies. You long for romance? Adventure? Lofty spiritual communion? The Ideal Lover reflects your fantasy. He or she is an artist in creating the illusion you require, idealizing your portrait. In a world of disenchantment and baseness, there is limitless seductive power in following the path of the Ideal Lover.

4. The Dandy: Most of us feel trapped within the limited roles that the world expects us to play. We are instantly attracted to those who are more fluid, more ambiguous, than we are — those who create their own persona. Dandies excite us because they cannot be categorized, and hint at a freedom we want for ourselves. They play with masculinity and femininity; they create their own physical image, which is always startling; they are mysterious and elusive. They also appeal to the narcissism of each sex: to a woman they are psychologically female, to a man they are male. Dandies fascinate and seduce in large numbers. Use the power of the Dandy to create an ambiguous, alluring presence that stirs repressed desires.

5. The Natural: Childhood is the golden paradise we are always consciously or unconsciously trying to re-create. The Natural embodies the longed-for qualities of childhood ‚— spontaneity, sincerity, unpretentiousness. In the presence of Naturals, we feel at ease, caught up in their playful spirit, transported back to that golden age. Naturals also make a virtue out of weakness, eliciting our sympathy for their trials, making us want to protect them and help them. As with a child, much of this is natural, but some of it is exaggerated, a conscious seductive maneuver. Adopt the pose of the Natural to neutralize people's natural defensiveness and infect them with helpless delight.

6. The Coquette: The ability to delay satisfaction is the ultimate art of seduction — while waiting, the victim is held in thrall. Coquettes are the grand masters of this game, orchestrating a back-and-forth movement between hope and frustration. They bait with the promise of reward ‚— the hope of physical pleasure, happiness, fame by association, power ‚— which, however, proves elusive; yet this only makes their targets pursue them the more. Coquettes seem totally self-sufficient: they do not need you, they seem to say, and their narcissism proves devilishly attractive. You want to conquer them but they hold the cards. The strategy of the Coquette is never to offer total satisfaction. Imitate the alternating heat and coolness of the Coquette and you will keep the seduced at your heels.

7. The Charmer: Charm is seduction without sex. Charmers are consummate manipulators, masking their cleverness by creating a mood of pleasure and comfort. Their method is simple: they deflect attention from themselves and focus it on their target. They understand your spirit, feel your pain, adapt to your moods. In the presence of a Charmer you feel better about yourself. Charmers do not argue or fight, complain or pester ‚— what could be more seductive? By drawing you in with their indulgence they make you dependent on them, and their power grows. Learn to cast the Charmer's spell by aiming at people's primary weaknesses: vanity and self-esteem.

8. The Charismatic: Charisma is a presence that excites us. It comes from an inner quality ‚— self-confidence, sexual energy, sense of purpose, contentment ‚— that most people lack and want. This quality radiates outward, permeating the gestures of Charismatics, making them seem extraordinary and superior, and making us imagine there is more to them than meets the eye: they are gods, saints, stars. Charismatics can learn to heighten their charisma with a piercing gaze, fiery oratory, an air of mystery. They can seduce on a grand scale. Learn to create the charismatic illusion by radiating intensity while remaining detached.

9. The Star: Daily life is harsh, and most of us constantly seek escape from it in fantasies and dreams. Stars feed on this weakness; standing out from others through a distinctive and appealing style, they make us want to watch them. At the same time, they are vague and ethereal, keeping their distance, and letting us imagine more than is there. Their dreamlike quality works on our unconscious; we are not even aware how much we imitate them. Learn to become an object of fascination by projecting the glittering but elusive presence of the Star.

10. The Anti-Seducer: Seducers draw you in by the focused, individualized attention they pay to you. Anti-Seducers are the opposite: insecure, self-absorbed, and unable to grasp the psychology of another person, they literally repel. Anti-Seducers have no self-awareness, and never realize when they are pestering, imposing, talking too much. They lack the subtlety to create the promise of pleasure that seduction requires. Root out anti-seductive qualities in yourself, and recognize them in others — there is no pleasure or profit in dealing with the Anti-Seducer.

Hah! So True

"Who will dress up as Clifford the dog, toss cell phones willie-nillie into unsuspecting comodes, consistently sport countless 80's t-shirts and accessories, and freelance in domesticated animal husbandry whilst pursuing a budding music career? In a word - nobody. Jeff, you will be missed. Wait a second, is Jeff even planning on showing up tonight? ;-) " ~ Drew